9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage is written by Sheila Wray Gregoire. It is an excellent book for any marriage. It contains new thoughts that can revolutionize the way many women think about their marriages. Sheila is the founder of the blog To Love, Honor, and Vacuum. Many times her posts have helped me in my marriage. Her perspective and wisdom on so many marriage topics is a true gift from God. I recommend all of her books.
Today, I would like to explain how one of the thoughts in her book changed my entire marriage. The thought is:
“I’m called to be a peacemaker, not a peacekeeper.”
Sheila explains how many women think that they are supposed to keep the peace in the marriage by agreeing with their husbands on the outside, but hurting deeply on the inside. In a way they think they have to let their husbands have their way with everything just to keep him happy and have a peaceful home. But, this isn’t real peace and in the end it is destruction.
This way of thinking led to many problems in my own marriage.
If you’ve been following this site, you know how much I love the devotional Draw Close by Willard & Joyce Harley. My husband and I have read quite a few devotionals in the past couple of years. However, this one has really spoken to us the most. Typically, devotionals have short, encouraging messages. Each day in this devotional is short, but it is filled with solid, Godly marriage wisdom. I was shocked at the insight this books gives to couples. I had a hard time letting go of how much I wish we had studied this book early on in our marriage.
I would like to share with you the book Pure Eyes, Clean Heart: A Couple’s Journey to Freedom from Pornography by Jen Ferguson and Craig Ferguson. This book is such an open, honest account of a marriage that has been hurt by pornography. It goes through the authors lives as they seek God for healing. Continue reading
52 Things Husbands Need from their Wives and 52 Things Wives Need from their Husbands by Jay Payleitner are two very helpful books.
After I found out that my husband was viewing pornography, I realized my marriage was not what I thought it was. After I got past the initial shock and sadness, I wanted to actively work on my marriage. One way that I work on my marriage is by reading with my husband. We do this by first and foremost reading the Bible. The Bible should be our number one reading material always. We read the Bible together and separately. There are also many books that can help us grow together as a couple and individually. So, I started my search for great books that will help us both grow closer to God and closer to each other. I would like to start sharing in detail the books that I love and that have helped both my husband and myself.