Many times when we are hurt and betrayed by our husband, we immediately feel anger! We have a right to be angry. It is extremely angering that our husbands would sin in this way, by being unfaithful to us. However, anger can be very harmful to us if used in a certain way.
I have found that all the times I’ve had uncontrollable anger and lashed out on my husband, I have regretted it. Anger made me turn into a person I never was and never wanted to be. I was just so angry all the time. Even more difficult was that I had no one to talk to about my anger and frustrations at my husband. I found it almost impossible to find out or hear about awful, disgusting things that he did in our marriage, without extremely getting angry.
I think it is very helpful to take a moment to pause every time that you feel uncontrollable anger. We need time to think about what our course of action will be. Take a moment to pray or cry. Write down a plan if you need to. But, don’t just respond in harmful ways that you will regret. They will not make your marriage better. If you have felt like me and you need a safe place to release your angry emotions by telling “someone” and then cooling off, you may do that here. All of us wives have experienced anger. This is a safe place to let go and let God. It does help knowing that we can share our deep emotions with others. Unfortunately, with this sin, it is usually too private to be accepted anywhere. I will help start with some of my anger and add to this whenever you need that moment to stop. When you are finished, let it go and make a plan. Even if you stop on this page just to meditate and reflect is fine also. Some thoughts are too personal to share.
– I am so angry that my husband looked at other women immediately after I fell asleep.
– I am so angry that he meticulously deleted all paths to finding out his secret so that I didn’t know for ten years!!!!
– I am so angry that even though my husband wants to move on and start again, I’m the one with such hurtful memories.