There have been many difficult things for me since I discovered my husband’s pornography use. One of those things is taking care of myself.
I have been greatly encouraged by the blog CalmHealthySexy.com by Gaye Groover Christmus. She shares so many healthy ideas. Today she is going to share some of those ideas with our community.
I’m honored that Robi asked me to share some ideas with you, and I thank you for welcoming me into this place of prayer, respite and community. I know that many of you are dealing with very difficult circumstances in your marriages, and I am praying for you as I write this.
Women often find it difficult to take care of themselves. More than likely, you find yourself in that position too. Maybe all of your time and energy are consumed by caring for others, leaving little time or energy for you. Maybe you’re facing situations that just seem overwhelming, and self-care seems like an impossible luxury. Maybe you don’t even realize that your body, mind and spirit need some tender loving care. Or maybe you just don’t believe that you deserve it.
If that’s the case, the thing I want to say to you today is this: You are a beautiful and valuable daughter of the King. Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. You need and deserve to care for your body, mind and spirit. You are worth it.
I know it’s hard to care for yourself when you’re caring for your children, managing your home, homeschooling, working, and juggling other responsibilities. And when you add tremendous marriage stress to the mix, it may seem impossible.
Periodically, I try to give an update on how my marriage has been currently. I talk a lot about past struggles, but I think it’s also important to share where we are today.
If you would like to read my last update, please click here.
My husband decided to go to a counselor. I have been frequently asked if my husband goes to counseling or if he has an accountability partner. Many wonder why he does not have an accountability partner. I think he would personally like to have one. However, he has not met someone yet that he feels he can share the details of his life with.
Because of this, we decide it’s best to share our lives, thoughts, temptations, and struggles with each other. However, due to several reasons, he has started going to counseling weekly.
I am happy to share with you today’s post from Bonny Logsdon Burns. She is the author and founder of OysterBed7.
Robi’s blog name is dead-on. Active hope is how God continues to lead me after our marriage’s initial devastation with pornography. Thank you, Robi, for allowing me to share my hope with your readers.
With our 2-year-old son asleep in the next room, I try to haul my pregnant belly into bed. I’m 35 weeks ginormous with identical twin boys. I lift my feet off the floor just as I hear the sound of a freight train outside, the tell-tale sign of a tornado.
A lifetime of tornado drills put my husband and I in auto-pilot. We know exactly what to do to have the greatest chance of survival.
It takes 60 seconds for the violent, F4 tornado to clear a path in our neighborhood. I barely have time to ask God for help.
The break of day finds me trembling in a hospital bed as I watch the aftermath on television. I weep from horror and gratefulness as I see the massive debris field of my neighborhood.
The first decade of my marriage was like this tornado. It was only in retrospect that I saw clues that a tornado was coming. We had foul weather swirling; nasty attitudes, disregard, dismissive and condescending behavior; until it all converged in devastating fall-out.